{The Flirtation; Eugene de Blass}
Every young gal has a little tool built into her that can be used when it pleases her. {I say "young" because this post is directed more towards the pre-teens/teenage young lady.} Likewise, every guy has a little tool built into him that can be used when it pleases him.
What is that tool?
Flirting.
..Yes, the well-known, well-used thing that comes to light when males and females are together. So why do we flirt? According to the Social Issues Research Center:
Why do we flirt? Flirting is much more than just a bit of fun: it is a universal and essential aspect of human interaction...
{*cough* ...pardon me for a moment...*HAHAHAHAHAHA!* ...okay. Now..}
~*~
...In other words, flirting, to the average person, is normal. A simple means of communication. A way to have fun and feel self-assured. Girls naturally feel insecure about themselves, so getting attention through flirtation is relieving. Something like, "Hey, I'm not as unattractive as I thought! This guy actually likes me?"
..Unfortunately, this is not always the case.
I recently read an interview with a Christian young man who was asked, "What do you consider flirting, and what do you think of a girl when she flirts with you?"
His answer: "..To be honest, flirting can be very fun...if not taken too far!"
..That led me to write this post. And I'm not saying I'm an expert on this topic--no way! I simply want to share my views, and then hear yours. :)
~*~
Let's start with what the Lord tells us through Philippians 4:8:
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
I highlighted the parts of this scripture that seem to almost discuss flirting. God is telling us to honor Him in everything, keep our hearts pure, and dwell only on the things that reflect Him.
Next, let's look at what the Merriam-Webster dictionary defines our topic as:
Flirt, verb \ˈflərt
a : to behave amorously without serious intent
b : to show superficial or casual interest or liking ;
c: to come close to reaching or experiencing something ("Flirting with danger," etc.)
So, it looks like we're dealing with behaving in a seemingly amorous {love-struck} manner superficially, coming close to something {real interest}, but not quite getting there. Playing with the affections of another human being. Experimenting. For fun.
Sound God-honoring to you?
~*~
Purity of the heart is something that the Lord puts an emphasis on greatly. Your heart is the "wellspring of life," {Proverbs 4:23} and what is within it/what you value effects your life. Is flirting really something that is thought-worthy? Is it a "so what?" Or "so wrong!" matter?
Let me get one thing straight before I go on:
There is no such thing as "minor flirting."
A.k.a., "flirting that isn't taken too far." A little bit of flirting is a lot of flirting--no exceptions. If you want to flirt, you can't take it any farther than that. To examine this a little further, let's go through the aspects of flirting which benefit you:
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1.) Attention makes you feel secure about yourself.
2. It's fun.
3.) It's enjoyable to talk about your recent flirting escapades with your girlfriends. :)
4.) A little bit once in awhile isn't going to hurt anything..
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...Sounds okay, doesn't it? Now, let's take a peek at the aspects of flirting which hurt you:
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1.) You give a piece of your attentions and emotions {your heart}--which are to be saved for one future person alone--over to countless people as the years in your "flirtation business" roll on.
2.) You come to find that a certain person who was flirting with you isn't really interested in you at all..they flirt all the time. *insert heartbreak that didn't need to be a part of your life*
3.) Someone {down the road in life} may think that you really *are* interested in them because you gave them false attention..big mess. o_O
4.) One by one pieces of your heart are given like candy to every eligible being that comes around, and when you finally find that One of Your Dreams, all you have are the wrappers and crumbs.
5.) Your future marriage gets messed up early on because you just have to flirt with that one over there..it's a habit by now.
6.) All of this isn't how God meant it to be.
~~~
It looks like flirting really isn't a "so what?" matter. Think about it--do you really want to give your heart away to someone whom you may not even be remembering a ways down the road? Or even if this is your destined partner, there is no way to know that now, so many years in advance--and you don't usually start off a good, healthy relationship through flirtation.
I'm not saying to completely distance ourselves from members of the opposite gender; more that we should just be aware and in control of our actions/emotions at all times. If we desire a pure heart, God will honor our motives and help us to stay within our boundaries. Stumbling is allowed, too, my dears! Nobody's perfect...myself least of all. ;) Remember:
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
{Philippians 4:13}
..sound God-honoring to you? I think so. :)